Day Seven: Moscow
From: Dandelion Snailrider To: Mr. A-- Subject: Day 7: The Red Menace Date: December 16, 2002 Dear Mr. A--, I read and re-read the sign at the North Pole but the only place name that I was able to make out was Moscow. So that's where I headed. With The Dread Snail Roberts only capable of a few feet per hour, it took me all night to arrive at Red Square. I fear that you are right and that I am becoming quite, quite lost. But my sojourn in Moscow is hardly a disappointment. There is Russian haggis here, made from sauerkraut and vodka, which is simply divine. I have made inquiries about having some shipped your way, but I'm afraid that the Fathers of the Russian Orthodox Church of the Quivering Otter have declared that it is a sin for Russian Sauerkraut Haggis to be consumed by anyone who has ever played Daddy Warbucks in a community theater production of _Annie_. I do not know if you have ever undertaken such a feat, but I felt that it would be prudent not to take the risk of endangering both our immortal souls. I have also made some wonderful friends while here in Moscow, as you can see from the attached photograph. I am honored to report that the children in this photograph have been named Ivan, Boris, and Dandelion. I begged them not to name the child after me, but apparently my status as a visiting gnome from Patagonia was too amazing for them to ever forget. My new friends also gave me directions to Campbell from Moscow. I fear that it is quite a trip! And I have only eight days to make it! But with courage and fortitude, I shall prevail. Da? Ha ha! Until my arrival, I remain Your loyal and obedient servant, Dandelion Snailrider